Because when it comes to envisaging how your labour and birth will unfold, how you (plural – mother and partner) are feeling matters more than ever.
The fundamental truism that ‘like attracts like’ is summed up well in that quote attributed to Henry Ford that ‘whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you are right’. This is the Law of Attraction at work, which uses the power of the mind to translate whatever is in our thoughts and materialize them into our reality. This impact that our mind has on our lives is becoming more apparent to us through the recent work by quantum physicists who understand that we cannot have a universe without the mind entering it.
So, how areyou feeling about your labour and birth? Strangely, feelings of fear, worry and negativity seem to be common features in the ‘birth space’ of Today. Beware, the Law of Attraction is obedient and it is not bias to what you want or don’t want – it is all too easy to leave your thoughts, which are intimately connected to our emotions, unchecked and unedited. The Law of attraction has no pause function, no stop button it is fully operational in response to our thoughts 24/7. Whether we intend to or not, every moment of our existence, we are acting as human magnets sending out our thoughts and emotions and attracting back more of what we have put out there. Think back to early on in your pregnancy, did you happen to notice that more pregnant women or parents with babies came onto your radar when previously they may not have registered?
Best of Intentions
Something will always manifest out of our thoughts. Based on the findings of experiments on the rates at which information is loaded into the subconscious and conscious mind, the Danish scientist and writer, Tor NØrretranders, confirmed two truths. The first is that our reality is created from the things we pay attention to and the second is that we can train our mind to pay attention to certain things rather than others. The adage that energy flows to where attention goes applies here. Consider that Life is a blank canvas of possibility and you are in control of what the finished picture could look like. Imagine that! Once we realise the possibilities, we can also come to understand that we are like artists creating pictures of our intended life and making choices and taking actions that will bring about what we envisaged. But what if we don’t like the picture? Well, we have options, because we have the ability to change it.
A Creative Process
Just take a moment now and bring your attention to your own current beliefs about labour and birth. That’s it, write them down if that helps to clarify them, no need to second guess them, just name them up. Then answer the following questions:
What is the main theme of these beliefs?
Where or from whom did you get these beliefs?
What feelings do these beliefs stir-up in you?
Are these feelings helpful or a hinderance to how you see your labour and birth unfolding?
Would you like to change how you are feeling about your labour and birth?
In accordance with the Law of Attraction, regardless of what we are seeking, with some effort on our part we can make it manifest. After all, our thoughts create our reality and the role we play in this creative process is to:
- Ask for what wewant.
- Believe in our ability to get it.
- Receive the fruits of our labour (no pun intended!).
Knowledge – Experience Link
Something we know for certain is that women experience birth in diverse and wonderful ways and certain universal truths have become apparent through centuries and across cultures that empower women to meet their individual challenges. We know that women birth best when they feel confident, supported and safe. ‘With knowledge comes Confidence’ is the Calmbirth Logo and I would argue they are words to live by.
My role as a Calmbirth Educator involves assisting pregnant couples to challenge their unhelpful beliefs about labour and birth and equip them with the knowledge, tools and resources they can use to cultivate a positive and empowering outlook on labour and birth. It’s about a couple honing their collective ability to use that creative process to integrate their intentions, their self-confidence and trust to create the best birth experience for mother, partner and baby – no matter where they are or how the journey unfolds. Does that attract yourattention?
Tor NØrretranders, 1999, The Use Illusion, Penguin Random House.