The HEART Acronym

In the Calmbirth program, you’ll often hear us talk about using your BRAINS during birth. BRAINS is a widely used decision-making framework, particularly in maternity care, that helps you evaluate your options, ask informed questions, and make decisions with confidence.

B – Benefits: What are the advantages or positive outcomes of this option?

R – Risks: What are the potential disadvantages, complications, or side effects?

A – Alternatives: What other choices or options are available to me?

I – Intuition: What is my gut feeling or instinct about this decision?

N – Nothing (or Need Time): What happens if I wait, take more time to decide, or choose to do nothing right now?

Alongside BRAINS, we also love using HEART in birth. Created by Milli Hill in The Positive Birth Book, HEART is another powerful framework that complements BRAINS and encourages you to stay connected to what matters most, even if your birth takes an unexpected turn.

Ask yourself these questions…

H – How can you keep the HORMONES flowing?

Oxytocin is the hormone that supports labour, bonding, and breastfeeding. As your birth unfolds and circumstances or your environment change, consider what you can do to encourage oxytocin to keep flowing.

Simple things can make a big difference dimming the lights, listening to your birth playlist through headphones, holding your partner’s hand, cuddling, or hearing reassuring words from your support team. If there’s no time for these comforts, focus on feelings of love love for your baby, your partner, and yourself for the incredible work you’re doing.

When oxytocin is flowing, it helps create a calm, supported birth environment.

E – What ELEMENTS of your birth plan can you keep?

If your birth doesn’t unfold exactly as you imagined, it doesn’t mean all of your birth preferences have to disappear.

Ask yourself: What elements of my birth plan can still be honoured?

Perhaps it’s immediate skin-to-skin contact, delayed cord clamping, playing your favourite music, having your partner announce your baby’s sex, or initiating breastfeeding as soon as possible.

If these things are important to you, speak up and advocate for them wherever possible.

A – Baby in your ARMS as soon as possible

However, your baby is born, aim to have them in your arms as soon as it is safe to do so.

Sometimes complications or emergencies mean this can’t happen immediately. If that’s the case, ask that you and your partner have the opportunity for skin-to-skin contact as soon as possible.

Remember, if immediate contact isn’t possible, you can still recreate the magic and benefits of the “Golden Hour” later.

R – REACH OUT for support

If your birth hasn’t unfolded the way you hoped, you may feel overwhelmed, disappointed, or even traumatised. These feelings are valid.

Lean on your village. Debrief with your healthcare provider, speak with a trusted birth professional, connect with friends or other mothers, or seek support from a counsellor if you need to.

Be gentle with yourself as you process your experience. Birth is significant, and your emotional wellbeing matters just as much as your physical recovery. The strength you’ve shown through birth will continue to carry you through motherhood.

T – Give yourself TIME

Birth is one of life’s most profound experiences, and it’s something you’ll remember forever.

Give yourself permission to process your birth in your own time. It’s okay to feel sad, disappointed, or to grieve the birth experience you had hoped for.

Those feelings do not diminish the love you have for your baby or your gratitude for their safe arrival. Both can exist at the same time.

Your experience matters. Your feelings matter. Healing takes time, and you deserve compassion as you move forward into this next chapter.